Never Really Changing
by Mrs. Pepper Stark
Summary: Three-Shot. I am Katniss Everdeen, I am married to Peeta Mellark, I have two children, Lucy and Lucas, and I still have a living mother. Prim is dead, Not real or real? Real..
1. Chapter 1

_**Please take into consideration that this is my first Hunger Games fan fiction, and I am not Suzanne Collins.**_

_**Disclaimer: I do not own The Hunger Games. **_

"Mother?" Lucy asks me, I shake out of my daze quickly – trying not to remember the nightmares. "Yes, dear?" I reply, softly; which still surprises Peeta, I guess he still has Mockingjay images in his head. "When are we going to school?" Lucy asks me, I look directly in her face, savouring a lasting image – her dark hair and blue eyes, pale skin standing out in her red dress.

"Soon, very soon. Remember, Lucas will be going a few years after you. Nothing to worry about." I tell her, as soon as I've said my son's name, I look around for him urgently- it is the first time I haven't noticed him today. It's only the afternoon- but he gets into trouble quickly, epically as a toddler. "Mum?" Lucy asks me again, I reply evenly, "Yes?"

"You do remember Daddy was taking out Lucas to the bakery, right?" She says, I gently slap her wrist and go of saying something about of course I do. I have to keep up the act, sometimes the nightmare's slowly creep up on me and fade my current memory- But I am not going to let my past control my future, not the way my own mum had. I must make an effort, I must help protect Lucas to, Lucy mustn't be left on her own.

"Mum? Hello?" Lucy replies from across the room, I find myself on the other edge of the room, standing- I can't remember getting up, just these few things in the day scare me. Thank goodness I have Peeta, even if he's fighting the nightmare's to. "Yes darling, I do remember. Should we go join them?" I reply, I am pretty sure Lucy was just about to sigh with relive, but she hides it quickly, but not quickly enough that I couldn't see.

"Okay! First, I will do your hair though." Lucy quickly answers, I throw her a confused glance until I glance in the mirror to see what she's on about; my hair's everywhere. The plait's come un-done, I can't remember the last time I- _I am Katniss Everdeen, I am married to Peeta Mellark, I have two children, Lucy and Lucas, and I still have a living mother. Not real or real? Real. It scares me I still have to do this, just to grip on reality, it almost reminds me of Haymitch, when myself and Peeta first meet him._

I blink, I find Lucy staring at me worriedly, but I quickly sit down to let her run her fingers through my hair, ever since mum's taught her how, she volunteer's every chance she gets to do my hair. Lucy reminds me of Prim sometimes, Prim; I still hate Snow- but now I let it go, it could have been Gale's bomb, I won't blame him; so I can't blame Snow, I can't blame someone for something they may or may not have done.

"When can I go hunting? With you?" Lucy suddenly asks, I glance in the mirror quickly, she's already nearly done. "Just have to be a little bit older Lucy, just a few years. Not too many." I reply, she grins at me. Unlike Lucas, she's inherited my shooting skills and Peeta's cooking; Poor Lucas doesn't seem to have a very good aim for shooting, but this is just a guess- he tried to throw a rock at Buttercup once, missed totally; they do not get on at all.

"Come on Mum. Let's go before they've used up the icing!" Lucy shouts at me from the front door,

I try to be brave and stand up, thankfully my mind hasn't taken over my body- yet.

I grab my coat and purse, I find Buttercup sleeping on a chair, I leave him there in peace- it's probably better to be inside at this time of the year anyway. "Coming!" I shout to Lucy as I quickly lock the back door and trudge to the front door, in frustration I bang myself on the toe on the way out, but I don't mind the pain- it holds my mental image onto reality, and the fact I've had a lot worse.

"Are you alright mummy?" Lucy asks me, she looks a bit stunned- I guess she thinks that should have hurt, but she's never had to go through what I have. I swear on my life I wouldn't let her go through mine, with so much grief and hardship- no wonder Haymitch couldn't cope at the start. "Yes Darling, I am fine. Let's hurry along before it gets dark."

She holds my hand and skips alongside next to me, this is the one thing she never questions- my sense of direction. She never has a doubt about that, at all. We can hear the birds signing from the forest, and we see most people walking about. I say hi to everyone that passes by, they all hear me but don't talk back, most of them know what I have been through. They probably think I will break down after a word spoken, I admit at one time I nearly couldn't speak- but that's in the past, not now.

"Mummy! Look what Daddy do!" I hear Lucas speak, I glance up to find myself in the Bakery – already, Peeta notices this, he notices everything. "Wow honey, yours is pretty good to." I reply in all honesty, Peeta's weeding cake for newly engaged couple looks wonderful, it reminds me of Annie's and Finnick's wedding cake; except for the fact that he's deliberately changed the colour's and pattern.

As for Lucas, he's tried to ice mini flowers onto the top of his own mini cake, it's almost like a mini version of Peeta's, there is no mistaking that Lucas is Peeta's son, there blonde hair makes them almost noticeable in every crowd.

"Thank you Mummy. Mummy, I made this for you." Lucas suddenly says, from behind his back he produces a cookie, it's flat- with chocolate, I smile at him and take it gratefully, even if he's still little, he has a knack for cooking, like his father. "Thank you so much." I reply, Peeta sends me a message through his eyes, I instantly know what this means; I am supposed to eat it, somehow- Peeta is better at this parent stuff than me. As soon as I take a bit the chocolate swirls among my tastebuds and I can taste the texture of the cookie, it's a tiny bit burnt but the miracle of the chocolate hides it quickly, just like Lucy's sigh of relive.

"Mmmm. Yummy!" I reply, this makes Lucas face light up with a grin that is so much like Peeta's I would have mistaken it for his, if it wasn't for his innocence eyes, free of killings and blood. But this doesn't stop me from loving Peeta, I have been through the same and this will never change.

_**I hope you have enjoyed this chapter, I might make it into a two-shot. Constructive feedback is welcome, no flames please.**_

_**From AccioDoctorWho, **_


	2. Chapter 2

_**Here is chapter two, please note this is only a two-shot. Also I am not Suzanne Collins so I can't write as good as her. (Chapter Two is from Peeta's point of view.)**_

_**Disclaimer: I do not own The Hunger Games **_

"Daddy?" Lucas asks me, it's been days since I went to the bakery, but Katniss made me take a break. "Yes? Lucas?" I reply, snapping myself out of my imaginary world.

"When we go bake?" He says, I pat Lucas on the head and give him a smile to reassure him, "Soon. I hope, hey- I have an idea." I reply. "What idea?" He replies, His bouncy head of blond hair jumps up and down in excitement, Katniss should have known to never keep us from baking. "Let's cook at home!" I whisper to him, thankfully Katniss and Lucy are out visiting her mother, in another district they left earlier today, so obviously they won't be home till late. But I want to make sure Buttercup doesn't hear, I am so sure that cat tells Lucy everything, even if it can't talk.

"What are we going to bake?" I ask him, letting him choose for once. "COOKIES!" Lucas shouts with a grin on his face, I grin back. Cookies are his favourite, and the plus side is- they are the easiest to make out of everything in the bakery.

We both head to the kitchen and I get out the pre-made dough in case of an emergency, and this- is defiantly an emergency. We haven't cooked in days. "Come help Dad flatten the dough." I tell Lucas from across the table, I split the dough in half so he can make a batch too. As soon as I grab the rolling pin and start slamming it onto the dough, it flattens as easily as a rubbish bag in the wind.

The movement in between my wrists forcefully gets stronger, and I can feel myself pushing too hard all of the sudden- causing a whole in the dough. I sigh in frustration and knead it again with the back of my hand, I can hear Lucas' laughter in the background as he already starts cutting out circle shaped cookies. My hand get's a hard raw edge that heats up, from hitting the table, I had accidentally missed-which was a good thing, otherwise I would have to start all over again.

"Daddy hurt?" Lucas suddenly asks, I cover up my face from a sting to a grin; which seems to work for Lucas; but it doesn't stop my hand from hurting. "Daddy's fine." I say, I quickly run it under a tap of water to stop Lucas from worrying, I have had to deal with much worse than a hurt hand, more like a

whole less foot. I come back to find my dough finally flattened, and being cut with Lucas' tiny circle shape cutter. "Thank you Lucas." We grin at each other momentarily, then I grab a star shape cutter and start cutting out tiny baby small stars.

After I have greased the pans, Lucas helps me put the circle and star shaped cookies on them. I thankfully remembered to put on the oven before-hand, so it's now ready to start cooking. I place the blue oven mitts on, when I have a flashback from when Katniss gave them to me at Christmas as a joke, I am sure she never would have thought I would actually use them; she should have known better, I love cooking.

"How long till ready?" Lucas questions me, "I think it should be done after dinner." I answer, I double check to make sure, and my estimation was right.

"Ding Dong." We both hear the door bell ring, I check the time and find it's already later than usual, we must have been too busy cooking to notice the clock ticking away.

"I'll get the door." I tell Lucas, but he follows me anyway, so there really wasn't much point in saying anything. By the time we get to the door, I am very surprised Katniss hasn't rung it again. I quickly unlock the door eager to see my wife and daughter, as soon as there beaming faces come into my view, I am waken by reality to hear my wife say, "See Lucy, I told you- heavy feet; the both of them." Lucas and myself are very confused for the next few moments until I realize what she means. "Katniss Mellark. You cheeky woman." I tell her winking, she surprises me by kissing the top of my head in front of both our children.

"Ewww. They exchanged germs!" Lucy shouts as she pushes her way through the door making me and Lucas both fall over creating a large sound. I struggle to stand up again, but I'm not hurt; neither is Lucas but he's still crying from the shock.

"_Deep in the meadow, under the willow, A bed if grass, a soft green pillow, Lay down your head, and close your sleepy eyes And when they open, the sun will rise."_ I find myself captured once again in Katniss' voice, but I come to reality to find her standing with Lucas in her arms signing the song, the kids take the song for granted; but I know what it means, especially after fighting to the death.

"_Here it's safe, here it's warm. Here the daisies guard you from every harm, Here your dreams are sweet and tomorrow brings them true, Here is the place where I love you." _I softly start joining on the last sentence, where I turn around to find Lucy fallen asleep with Buttercup, when I turn back to Katniss I am defiantly not surprised to see Lucas sleeping.

"So, should I start making dinner?" Katniss whispers into my ear with a huge grin that spreads across her face starting and ending at both her ears. "How about we both cook it for a change?" I question her, she giggles- and it takes me moments to realize how she has interpreted my sentence. "No, not in that way- I mean the actual cooking." I hurriedly explain, she puts Lucas down next to Lucy and Buttercup.

"Sure, we better get started before they wake up again." Katniss finally replies, we hold each other's hand and enter the kitchen; to my dismay when I remember the cookies.

"Ahem. What is this?" Katniss puts both her hands on her waist, and stares deadly daggers at my eyes.

"Well, you did say bakery Katniss, you never mentioned at home." I smirk at her once I have finished speaking, she rolls her eyes.

"Peeta Mellark, whatever will I do with you?" She says,

"Don't you mean without?" I interrupt her grinning, we smile at each other and it seems for the first time in both our lives; everything is perfect. 

**The end**

**Constructive feedback is welcome, no flames please. From AccioDoctorWho,**


	3. Chapter 3

_**I couldn't help to write more... So I guess this is a three-shot now.**_

_**Disclaimer: I do not own The Hunger Games**_

As I look up to pause from eating, I find my whole family slurping their meals, I even spot Lucy giving some to Buttercup. "Lucy, I know Lamb stew is very nice- but don't give any to him." I tell her, I also spot Peeta staring at me from across the room; for some reason a faint blush appears on his pale skin, as soon as he looks away it's gone.

Just as I am about to start eating again, I spot Lucas grinning naughtily. It's like those two have a connection that even I don't know about, I sigh with annoyance as I finally start eating, the amount of noise they all made when they woke up was un-imaginable. Epically Lucas, he couldn't believe we had cooked without him, even Buttercup was winging about the smell of the cookies- oh no!

It's all a blur, I can't remember standing up and heading to the kitchen in a run, but I did it; the only thing that woke me up was the burn from the trays; the cookies are a tiny bit burnt- from being left into too long, but they still should be ok, even if I do not cook- I still know the basics. "What-" I turn around to see a very angry Peeta, but as soon as he notices the trays of cookies his face turns guilty. "Didn't you smell the smoke?" I say, as I put them down on the table. My hand is still burnt, but it should wear off in a couple of days. "No." He eventually replies.

"Wait- Who's looking after the kids?" I suddenly say, leaving them with food without supervision – I don't even want to think about it. Peeta's face without words, confirms my worst fear, not really- but I hate cleaning up. "Please?" I whisper, he stands there with a very guilty look, his blonde hair is flowing gently across his face, even though there's no wind. "Come on." I say angrily, I grab his hand and our hands connect perfectly, like we were made for each other; but that wouldn't be a surprise.

I was completely right, Lucas has poured his whole bowl of soup over Lucy, and Buttercup is licking her. Lucas is just as messy as Lucy; he has soup all over his face and hands. "Food is for your mouth not your face." I tell the both of them, I turn to find Peeta grinning. "I'll clean the kids." He replies, I sigh in annoyance. That must mean I am stuck with washing Buttercup, all cat's hate baths, epically him. I sneak up behind him, on the tip of my toes; he senses movement; but I can tell he doesn't know where it is coming from.

As soon as I grab him in a stable position, I can feel his soft fur; but I can also hear his loud hissing. "Shut up." I hiss at him; he growls at me. I nearly drop the cat if it wasn't for Lucy's shocked face, I continue carrying him to the bathroom; I put him inside the tub so he can't escape while I am locking the bathroom door. I pick him up once again and Buttercup starts wailing again even older, as soon as I put him down on the ground he chases after the ball of string that Lucy gave him.

I make sure the water is just right before I put in the plug, after I have; Peeta walks into the room unlocking the door. Yes, letting Buttercup run wild around the house.

"Peeta, we are so swapping. You did that on your own intention." I hiss at him, he sighs.

"I don't know why you two don't get along, you act exactly like each other." Peeta replies grinning, I walk past him and slap him on his wrist on the way out; I can practically sense him smirking. "Lucy? Lucas?" I shout and in return, I hear no answer. Once I walk into the spare bathroom, I find them sitting on chairs still covered in muck. "Doesn't Daddy clean you at all?" I ask them, but they do not give a response; as if they know something I don't.

I grab a cloth and run it through warm water, gently squeezing afterwards. I do Lucas first, as he is the most impatient. He holds his hands up to me, grinning; I slowly wipe his hands clean with the cloth making sure I don't miss anything. After I wipe his mouth as well, I find myself in the arena, with Rue; she's signing her song, jumping around the trees, I try to catch up to her; to save her; but I can never reach her in time.

"Mummy? Mummy? Are you alright?" Rue suddenly says, I blink and find myself in the bathroom, in front of Lucy.

"Mummy?" She repeats, "What? Yes sorry, I am fine." I quickly respond, bending down so I can feel the cold bathroom floor, to grip to reality. "Give me your hands." I ask her, she doesn't respond, but she still holds out her hands, her nails are chipped but we both couldn't care less. I do the same as I did with Lucas, but she struggles at the touch of the cold water.

"Nearly done, darling." I tell her as I wipe her mouth. Lucas runs out of the room as soon as we hear Buttercup's waling and Peeta's groans. Lucy quickly heads after him as well, I throw the cloth in the sink; can Peeta do anything without me?

As soon as I enter the room, I find Buttercup on the top of Peeta's head, and I notice Buttercup has clawed Peeta's hands. I try to ignore Peeta's face, as it clearly states- Why did we keep the cat; but we both really know it's because of Prim. I pick up Buttercup and let Lucy holds him, she gently pats the cat as if he's a prince.

I grab Peeta's hands that are somehow always warmer than mine, and run them under warm water and pat them dry. "Thank you." I hear Peeta say, I look up and find myself glued to his beautiful blue eyes; and his ashy blonde hair that waves gently over his face. Suddenly I find myself in the air, literally; I look down and find Peeta's hands on my waist, holding me in the air as if I weigh nothing at all.

"My turn!" Lucas shouts, Peeta grins and quickly kisses me on the mouth, before letting me down. I can still feel the gentle touch of his lips, even though he's already let go. I see him pick up Lucas, and he walks around the room with him in a quick pace, trying to make a feeling of a bird flying. "Does Lucy want a go?" Peeta asks her as I see him put Lucas down again. Lucy shakes her head, and continues to pat Buttercup who is finally purring instead of growling.

"Does it get better than this?" Peeta whispers into my ear, holding my hand.

"Guess we will have to see." I reply with a mischievous grin.

_**The end, for real this time! I hope you enjoyed my story, constructive feedback welcome. No flames please, AccioDoctorWho.**_


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